What Does It Feel Like to Live with Tourette Syndrome?
“I’m not a doctor, not a medical professional, and definitely not someone who can give advice or treatment. At most, I could throw in a few World of Warcraft-style spells… but let’s stay grounded.”
What Does Tourette Feel Like in Daily Life
I’ve read all your comments, and one in particular really stuck with me: someone asked what it actually feels like to live with Tourette Syndrome. And the truth is, I don’t know—because I don’t think I’ve ever known anything different.
Growing Up with Tourette Syndrome
I’ve had tics for as long as I can remember: coughing, spitting, making noises with my tongue. It was a nightmare at the nuns’ school—I used to lock myself in the bathroom. Back then there was no diagnosis of Tourette, so I was just “the annoying one,” especially during prayers. But I never saw it as something strange. It was just… normal to me.
As a kid I was hyperactive. The more tired I got, the more hyperactive I became. I was the “weird kid,” the one other parents didn’t want their children playing with. Some teachers would literally divide the playground, and the well-behaved kids made sure to keep their distance.
And yet, I was actually a pretty cool kid—I just didn’t know it.
It’s like asking someone who’s never walked what it feels like not to walk. They can’t answer—there’s no comparison.
Today you might have a name for it. You might know that things like obsessions come from it. But when I was little, I didn’t know any of that.
Why People Don’t Understand Tourette
One phrase that used to drive me crazy was: “I know exactly how you feel.”
No, you don’t. Anyone without Tourette doesn’t know what it feels like. They don’t know what it means to have to do something or feel physically uncomfortable if you don’t. To repeat it again and again. Or to be pushed into it by someone else.
Maybe you mimic one of our sounds and nothing happens to you. For us, that can turn into a tic that lasts a year.
Maybe I need my mum to turn left instead of right—or no, twice right and twice left—because I literally can’t process doing just one thing instead of the other. It’s like hitting a mental wall.
I don’t know what it’s like not to have it. I don’t know what it’s like to walk under a staircase without feeling uneasy, to leave the house without going back, to live without these automatic responses.
Learning to Live with Tourette
When you’re young, people always get it wrong. Whatever they say feels wrong.
Then you grow up, and you start to understand things: the sacrifices, the anger, the panic, the sudden emotional outbursts. Because in the end, we all have our own tics. And eventually, you come to terms with it.
I hope I wasn’t too unpleasant. I’m off to enjoy the sun—it’s a beautiful day today. See you next time.
Happy tics to everyone.
